SURPRISE, I was bored so I figured why not write a post? Sooo, enjoy:**
I don't get me, seriously. One minute I want him to stay away from me and the next I want to be as close to him as possible.
What's happening to me?
A voice in the back of my head said "you looooove him" but as usual, I ignored it.
I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn't even notice him speaking to me so I snapped out of it.
"I'm sorry, what?" I said, trying to focus on his voice and not let my mind wander off.
He laughed. Oh, that goosebumps causing laugh. I couldn't help but shiver, in a good way.
"9arle sa3a aklmich akher shay tgouleen ma sma3t?" He said, his eyes twinkling from his previous laughing session.
"Ba3ad shswe I was thinking huff" I said while crossing my arms around my chest and may I dare say, I pouted.
We were at a red light and when he turned around to see me, suddenly all traces of joking left his face and was replaced with seriousness.
"You're beautiful" he whispered, looking at me straight in the eye.
I knew that he could see me blush even in the dark. I was so used to HIM calling me names like; ugly, worthless, retard, etc.
This was the first time in years that someone has complimented me.
"Ughh, thanks" I said, trying to look anywhere but his direction.
He was gonna reply but the red light turned green, saving me.
I had a feeling that something bad was gonna happen, something really bad.
But I pushed it away, reminding myself that the beast is out of town so there's nothing to be afraid of.
But I was so wrong.
Sweat started gathering on my forehead, my heart beats were getting unnaturally fast, tears started welling up in my eyes.
He stopped the engine, "we're her- Norah shfeeich?!" His gaze dropped to my shaking hands.
I couldn't speak, I couldn't even think.
There was a car in the driveway but not just any car.
My dads car.
He's here.
I didn't even see Khaled getting out of the car and sitting in the back seat, next to me.
"Norah please tell me what's wrong" his pleading eyes forced a stray tear to slide down my cheek.
"I-i-i-i am fine" I kept choking on my words.
"No you're not" he said, trying to catch a glimpse of my face, a face I was hiding with my hair.
I knew I had to be brave and suck it in.
"Ma feene shay" my face firm, my voice strong. I will never allow any one to see me being weak.
"But you ar-"
I forced a big smile and said, "I'm fine, really".
"Are you sure?.." He said, his voice was unsure.
I was always a good liar. It's something I'm not proud of.
"Pshhtttt positive" another smile was forced, as I got out of the car, holding a sleeping Abdullah in my arms and headed to our gate.
I disobeyed my father now I must suffer the consequences.
Before I went in, I turned around and gave Khaled a smile, for deep down I believed that this may be the last time I'll ever see him. Life isn't fair.
I opened the gate and gelt elad3eya. Da3ait ena 3aboud doesn't get in harms way. My faith in Allah was stronger now than ever.
I shook a sleeping 3aboud who was in my arms. I'd hate to interrupt his peaceful slumber but I needed him to be awake.
"7beebe 3aboud wakey wakey" I whispered in his ears, waiting for his angelic eyes to open. He started mumbling, a sign that he was waking up. We both were light sleepers, I wonder why.
Finally, he was awake. I placed him on the floor and sank to his level and said," 3aboud 7beebe listen to me, awal ma afta7 elbab abeeik tarketh, okay? I want you to run as quickly as possible to your room and lock it and law shnu y9eer ma tfta7a expect for me, okay?" Tears were welling up, a few traitorous ones came down.
I could tell he understood everything," Nogha what's happening?" His voice was vulnerable, he was vulnerable.
I gave him a tight smile, "everything's fine baby, just do what I told you to do" I kissed his forehead.
He slowly nodded and I took that as a sign to finally go inside.
يا رب احفظنا.
As soon as I stepped into our house the smell of cigarettes almost knocked my over, making me wanna throw up.
"Go" I whispered to Abdullah and he started to run.
Everything was quiet, too quiet.
يا رب يا رب يا رب
"Ga3da tdawreen 3lay?" A voice said behind me, making me yelp in fright.
"I-i-i-i can explain" my shaky voice said, my eyes were wide open.
He started walking towards me, looking at me from my hair to my feet.
And that's when the first blow "punch" to my stomach came.
After that everything became black.
-Comments?
@chanceinloveq8
Wednesday, 30 January 2013
Monday, 21 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world. Chapter 8
First of all, i'm sorry for being late and second of all, this is the last chapter I'm gonna write till I finish my finals. Sorry x
I panicked, I didn't want anyone to know what's happening in my life especially him.
So I did what I had to do, "it's nothing" i said, my voice harsh.
I do feel that he pulled the car over and faced me but I kept looking forward. "entay 3balich ana ghabe? That is not nothing! It's something, something big!" his voice was getting louder, almost waking 3aboud up.
I couldn't take it anymore, I knew what I'm gonna do is going to break my heart but it needed to be done.
"I said it was nothing and it is nothing! And why are you asking me such personal questions you're my cousin and my cousin only, malik shghel feene" i said those words while looking out the window, I kept imagining that it was my dad so I wouldn't crack.
I felt the tension and the quietness that was in the air. I sneaked a peek at his face and I wish I hadn't, what I saw made me want to apologize repeatedly for the next 6 years.
"wow, I'm sorry for caring about you 'cousin' I'll get out of your hair" he said while turning the car on and continued our way to the grandma's.
The ride was so silent that you cab hear a pin drop, not really just an expression.
The old and caring Khaled was long gone and was replaced by an angry guy who can be almost passed as heartless with his glaring eyes.
10 minutes later, 3aboud woke up feeling energized and refreshed. I knew deep down in my heart that I was doing the right thing, at least that's what i'm convincing myself with.
"kalid -khlaed in baby language- are we there yet?" Abdullah said while leaning forward to check on us. His eyes so innocent and soft waiting for an answer.
I turned my head to look at Khaled and I saw him grasping the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles became white. So I answered my brother instead of him, "ka 7beebe shway ou no9al, sit back" I said while throwing a smile at his direction.
"okay nougha" he said, smiling back at me.
It was 3:12 when we finally arrived, Khaled helped Abdullah out of the car but without even glancing my way and it made me feel even worse. But I'm used to pushing people away from me if they came close to finding the secret.
My train of thoughts was cut off when I heard my grandma's squeal so i looked at her direction and there she was, my second favorite person -Abdullah being the first of course- in the whole world standing right in front of me.
"NANNAAAA" I yelled and started running towards her, hugging her with all my might. Man, I've missed her so much!
"Noura my darling you have grown so much!" she said while holding my face in the palm of her hands, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.
"I know nana, I know" a few tears betrayed me and went flowing down my cheeks.
"nanniiiiii" I suddenly heard Abdullah yell, trying to run with his short legs. I got out of the way so they could have their moment and when I looked behind me I saw Khaled leaning on a wall smiling at the scene that was infront of him but that smile turned into a frown when he caught me looking at him.
I mouthed 'I'm sorry' to him and he pretended that he didn't see me but I knew he did.
"shd3wa don't I get a hug too?" a voice said behind me.
And when I turned around I saw that it was my favorite aunt in the world! Well, she's my only aunt since Khaled's mom passed away a few years ago due to a terrible car accident which lead to his dad and himself to move to the US.
Back to the real world:
"Khalty Shougggg?! -gasp-" I said, mouth wide open. Man did she change after her divorce! P.S. She's Nawal's mom.
she started to walk towards me saying "shda3wa ma 3rafteene?"
I giggled, "no! Kelish" I said while kissing both of her cheeks.
"I missed you baby doll" she said while holding my hand.
"and I missed you too, more than you can imagine"
Let me describe my family:
My grandpa met my grandma when he was studying abroad at the UK and fell in live with her instantly so they had a small ceremony and got married and after they graduated they moved here, in Kuwait. Of course my nana was Kuwaiti also but she had lived all her life in the UK. After they graduated they wanted to start a family, so first they had my uncle Hamad who is now 44, a widower with 2 children. Then came my aunt Sara, Khaled's mom may she rest in peace. After Sara came my mother, Farah and last but not least came my aunt Shoug.
This is my moms side of the family. This is home.
Once lunch was set on the table everyone started rushing around trying to get their seat before everyone else. Abdullah was with the housekeeper and since everyone already had a seat on the table I was left out, standing like an idiot facing the floor.
Everyone was so absorbed into eating that only one person noticed me standing alone, Khaled.
He got up from his seat and came to where I'm standing. "heyy shfeeich?" he said, his voice full of care and sincerity.
"um, its stupid actually..." I said, my voice low and quite.
"well I'm listening" he told me while crossing his arms, as if he's saying that he's not going anywhere until I tell him what's wrong. Ugh darn his cute stubbornness. :(
"hehe well I don't have a chair.."
And he did what if you may ask? He laughed, he laughed at me when I told him that. -.-
"yakhtiii kel hatha 3lashan ma3ndich a chair? Khla9 wala tz3leen take mine!" he said, his eyes twinkling with laughter.
"no it's oka-" he cut me off by saying, "Noura it's fine really" with all seriousness.
"okay fine" I said, finally giving in.
After eating the most amazing machbous deyay ever, we all sat in the living room drinking chai and just chit chatting.
"ha 7beebte which university are you planning to go to?" my nana asked me.
"I got accepted into GUST"
"ohh ma3a Khaloud" Nawal suddenly said, appearing out of the blue.
"bismellah entay wain kentayy?" I said to Nawal
"kent naymaaaa" she said while yawning.
She took a seat next to me saying "did you like the little surprise? -wink wink-"
"I'd appreciate it if you told me sooner mu you give me a heart attack!-.-" I whispered.
"dude its called a surprise" she said while rolling her eyes.
I was gonna reply to her but a sleepy Abdullah interrupted me saying "nougha I wanna go home"
I was disappointed cause I wanted to stay a little more but I said "yala baby now enrou7"
"haw wain btrou7een?" my nana suddenly said, her hands on her hips.
"nana lazim ared elbait 3aboud ta3ban:(" I said with a frown.
I could tell that she was upset but she let us go.
When I said goodbye to everyone and started making my way to the door I remembered that I had no ride-.-
But luckily there was someone who was leaving also and I was praying it was Nawal so I can ask her for a ride back home. But it wasn't.
It was Khaled.
I was gonna make my way back into the house when he saw me. "shfeekum ga3deen bara?" he said while looking at me and a sleeping 3aboud who was in my arms.
"ugh we have no ride.." I was embarrassed to ask him that since we all know what happened the last time we were in the same vehicle.
I was hoping he'd decline but being the nice person he is he said fine. Yippe.
-Comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
I panicked, I didn't want anyone to know what's happening in my life especially him.
So I did what I had to do, "it's nothing" i said, my voice harsh.
I do feel that he pulled the car over and faced me but I kept looking forward. "entay 3balich ana ghabe? That is not nothing! It's something, something big!" his voice was getting louder, almost waking 3aboud up.
I couldn't take it anymore, I knew what I'm gonna do is going to break my heart but it needed to be done.
"I said it was nothing and it is nothing! And why are you asking me such personal questions you're my cousin and my cousin only, malik shghel feene" i said those words while looking out the window, I kept imagining that it was my dad so I wouldn't crack.
I felt the tension and the quietness that was in the air. I sneaked a peek at his face and I wish I hadn't, what I saw made me want to apologize repeatedly for the next 6 years.
"wow, I'm sorry for caring about you 'cousin' I'll get out of your hair" he said while turning the car on and continued our way to the grandma's.
The ride was so silent that you cab hear a pin drop, not really just an expression.
The old and caring Khaled was long gone and was replaced by an angry guy who can be almost passed as heartless with his glaring eyes.
10 minutes later, 3aboud woke up feeling energized and refreshed. I knew deep down in my heart that I was doing the right thing, at least that's what i'm convincing myself with.
"kalid -khlaed in baby language- are we there yet?" Abdullah said while leaning forward to check on us. His eyes so innocent and soft waiting for an answer.
I turned my head to look at Khaled and I saw him grasping the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles became white. So I answered my brother instead of him, "ka 7beebe shway ou no9al, sit back" I said while throwing a smile at his direction.
"okay nougha" he said, smiling back at me.
It was 3:12 when we finally arrived, Khaled helped Abdullah out of the car but without even glancing my way and it made me feel even worse. But I'm used to pushing people away from me if they came close to finding the secret.
My train of thoughts was cut off when I heard my grandma's squeal so i looked at her direction and there she was, my second favorite person -Abdullah being the first of course- in the whole world standing right in front of me.
"NANNAAAA" I yelled and started running towards her, hugging her with all my might. Man, I've missed her so much!
"Noura my darling you have grown so much!" she said while holding my face in the palm of her hands, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.
"I know nana, I know" a few tears betrayed me and went flowing down my cheeks.
"nanniiiiii" I suddenly heard Abdullah yell, trying to run with his short legs. I got out of the way so they could have their moment and when I looked behind me I saw Khaled leaning on a wall smiling at the scene that was infront of him but that smile turned into a frown when he caught me looking at him.
I mouthed 'I'm sorry' to him and he pretended that he didn't see me but I knew he did.
"shd3wa don't I get a hug too?" a voice said behind me.
And when I turned around I saw that it was my favorite aunt in the world! Well, she's my only aunt since Khaled's mom passed away a few years ago due to a terrible car accident which lead to his dad and himself to move to the US.
Back to the real world:
"Khalty Shougggg?! -gasp-" I said, mouth wide open. Man did she change after her divorce! P.S. She's Nawal's mom.
she started to walk towards me saying "shda3wa ma 3rafteene?"
I giggled, "no! Kelish" I said while kissing both of her cheeks.
"I missed you baby doll" she said while holding my hand.
"and I missed you too, more than you can imagine"
Let me describe my family:
My grandpa met my grandma when he was studying abroad at the UK and fell in live with her instantly so they had a small ceremony and got married and after they graduated they moved here, in Kuwait. Of course my nana was Kuwaiti also but she had lived all her life in the UK. After they graduated they wanted to start a family, so first they had my uncle Hamad who is now 44, a widower with 2 children. Then came my aunt Sara, Khaled's mom may she rest in peace. After Sara came my mother, Farah and last but not least came my aunt Shoug.
This is my moms side of the family. This is home.
Once lunch was set on the table everyone started rushing around trying to get their seat before everyone else. Abdullah was with the housekeeper and since everyone already had a seat on the table I was left out, standing like an idiot facing the floor.
Everyone was so absorbed into eating that only one person noticed me standing alone, Khaled.
He got up from his seat and came to where I'm standing. "heyy shfeeich?" he said, his voice full of care and sincerity.
"um, its stupid actually..." I said, my voice low and quite.
"well I'm listening" he told me while crossing his arms, as if he's saying that he's not going anywhere until I tell him what's wrong. Ugh darn his cute stubbornness. :(
"hehe well I don't have a chair.."
And he did what if you may ask? He laughed, he laughed at me when I told him that. -.-
"yakhtiii kel hatha 3lashan ma3ndich a chair? Khla9 wala tz3leen take mine!" he said, his eyes twinkling with laughter.
"no it's oka-" he cut me off by saying, "Noura it's fine really" with all seriousness.
"okay fine" I said, finally giving in.
After eating the most amazing machbous deyay ever, we all sat in the living room drinking chai and just chit chatting.
"ha 7beebte which university are you planning to go to?" my nana asked me.
"I got accepted into GUST"
"ohh ma3a Khaloud" Nawal suddenly said, appearing out of the blue.
"bismellah entay wain kentayy?" I said to Nawal
"kent naymaaaa" she said while yawning.
She took a seat next to me saying "did you like the little surprise? -wink wink-"
"I'd appreciate it if you told me sooner mu you give me a heart attack!-.-" I whispered.
"dude its called a surprise" she said while rolling her eyes.
I was gonna reply to her but a sleepy Abdullah interrupted me saying "nougha I wanna go home"
I was disappointed cause I wanted to stay a little more but I said "yala baby now enrou7"
"haw wain btrou7een?" my nana suddenly said, her hands on her hips.
"nana lazim ared elbait 3aboud ta3ban:(" I said with a frown.
I could tell that she was upset but she let us go.
When I said goodbye to everyone and started making my way to the door I remembered that I had no ride-.-
But luckily there was someone who was leaving also and I was praying it was Nawal so I can ask her for a ride back home. But it wasn't.
It was Khaled.
I was gonna make my way back into the house when he saw me. "shfeekum ga3deen bara?" he said while looking at me and a sleeping 3aboud who was in my arms.
"ugh we have no ride.." I was embarrassed to ask him that since we all know what happened the last time we were in the same vehicle.
I was hoping he'd decline but being the nice person he is he said fine. Yippe.
-Comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
Tuesday, 15 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world. Chapter 7
I couldn't wipe that goofy smile on my face, like literally.
After getting the eggs I started skipping around. Yes, skipping. I think I'm going down with a fever. This is all Khaled's fault-.- ever since he came back into my life I've been a complete mess! Darn him and his cute smile and amazing eyes and fit body and and and :( I think you got my point. I couldn't believe in love, I just couldn't. I can't risk it.
But a voice in the back of my head said, "live a little. you deserve it"
I'm just gonna go with the flow...
It was half past twelve and it was settled, we're going to my grandma's place for lunch which is in like 2 hours.
It's been half an hour and I'm still sitting indian style 'mtrb3a' towards my closet trying to decide what to wear.
I can't wear something expensive, they'd think I was trying so hard. And I can't wear something mehhh cause they'd think that I didn't care. Ughhhhhhh being a girl sucks! Big time.
My eyes were focused on the pile on clothes that were on the floor. As if an outfit would magically pop in my hands. I want superpowers :(
"Noughaaaa shtsween?" 3aboud said, suddenly appearing at my door, scaring the heck out of me.
"way 7beebe khra3tny" I said while clutching my chest, breathing unevenly. "Oh and i'm looking for something to wear, help me?" I gave him one of my own puppy dog eyes. I was told that they were irresistible.
"ugh fine if I must"
Boy that kid sure knows fashion! He picked a gorgeous outfit! -in the end- but the skirt was longer and without the beanie.
"thank you so much babyyyy" I gave him a wet kiss on the cheek. Enjoying watching him get all disgusted::
I looked at the clock and saw that it was 1 o'clock already:o
Crap I need to get ready fast! I told 3aboud to tell Mila to dress him and I went to take a quick shower.
After blowing my hair I was glad to see that it was naturally straight and I only had my makeup left.
While putting on mascara my phone started ringing and answered it without checking the caller I.D thinking it was Nawal but I was wrong.
"Nawal tara e7na khl9na yala ta3lay" Nawal was our ride there since I don't remember where they lived.
"affaa you actually thought I was Nawal? I'm hurt" a deep voice startled me making me drop my mascara.
"Khaled you scared me! Wait where did you get my number?"
"save the questions for the car, I'm coming in 10 minutes"
Huh? "wait wait, Nawal is my ride not you" I was hoping that he'd pick me up but I had to point that out.
"yeah she just called me malha khelg so she told me to get you" I did my happy dance \o/
"well fine then.. Bye"
"haha bye beautiful" his manly laugh created butterflies in my stomach.
After I hanged up with him, I finished my makeup and doubled checked on how I looked and wend to 3aboud's room.
What I found broke my heart into small pieces. I found him laying on his stomach, his eyes so focused on the picture he was holding. I knew what that picture was.
It was a picture of my mom.
He was too young to understand what happened that I told him that mama went away but she'll be back. Of course I was lying, she will never come back.
I felt a vibration in my purse and I knew I had an incoming call. And when I looked at the caller I.D it was Khaled and he texted me saying that he was outside.
Since I was standing outside his door I gentling knocked on it, announcing that I was there cause he told me once that he wanted his privacy and didn't want anyone to go inside his room without knocking first. That kid is so mature. We both were too mature for our ages. I blame all the incidents that happened to us.
When he heard the knocks he quickly hid the picture underneath his pillow. He doesn't like to show his weakness, 6ale3 3la his big sister. <3
"yala 7beebe it's time to go" I said in a gentle voice pretending that I didn't notice what happened.
"okay yala nougha" he said while jumping off his bed and came to hold my hand. He was "nervous" but so was I. I wasn't nervous about my grandma's place but I was nervous of being in Khaled's car.
I could tell 3aboud was mad when he saw Khaled standing outside waiting for us in the hot summery weather. Yeah, I forgot to mention, he gets jealous over any male he sees approaching me. He thinks all males are beasts of course he was an exception.
I swear my fingers were going to fall off any second now that's how hard he's holding my hand. But all thoughts of pain went out of my ear when I saw Khaled. His biceps looked fit not the big muscular type but the hot type. And he was pushing his hair away from his forehead. He still didn't notice us well of course not until Abdullah 'introduced himself'
"Hi I'm nougha's big brother so stay away from her" he said while staring daggers at Khaled. I swear if looks could kill he'd be six frets under ground..
"oh hey there big guy my name is Khaled and i'm your cousin" he said while giving him a half smile, showing his deep dimple. Man do I like a guy who has dimples.
3abouds eyes had doubt in them so h turned to me saying "nougha is he my cousin?" that's when Khaled noticed me. FINALLY.
I couldn't help but giggle, "yes 3aboud he is"
His face changed from anger to happy in a matter of seconds. And he opened the back door of the car and put on his seltbelt.
"wow" he whispered while looking at me from my feet to my face.
I was so shy and my red face became redder, if that was possible. "um we should go we don't wanna be late" I said while looking at the ground and walking towards the car.
I felt butterflies in my stomach when he opened the car door for me, still in a daze. God bless Abdullah's fashion choice.
The car ride was silent so he started small talking with 3aboud and I could tell that Abdullah liked him from the way he opened up to him.
Half way there 3aboud fell asleep so it was just Khaled and I. I started a conversation with him cause I was so close to falling asleep myself.
"soo you in uni or what? And how come I just found out that I have a cousin called Khaled?"
"woah slow down beautiful, one question at a time" he said while throwing me his one million dollar smile.
"hehe sorry" I smiled shyly.
"it's fine so to answer your first question I'm gonna be attending gust this September and for the second one I just came back from the states, me and my parents lived there for seven years so..."
Oh god what a coincidence that we will be at the same uni? I was going to ask him some more questions when he accidentally went across a mu6ba without slowing down. Thank god it was a small one but I did bump my head into the cars roof.
But after a few seconds we started laughing like crazy cause of my screams when we hit the mu6ba::
But his laugh died off when he saw something and not just any something, he saw one of my bruises that was on one of my thighs.
Apparently when my head hit the roof my skirt lifted a bit and showed them.
"NOURA WHAT IS THAT?" he said, voice angry and eyes wide open in shock and fright.
"uhh I can explain...." I said while covering them.
I'm not gonna get out of this one so easily.
-Comments
@Chanceinloveq8
After getting the eggs I started skipping around. Yes, skipping. I think I'm going down with a fever. This is all Khaled's fault-.- ever since he came back into my life I've been a complete mess! Darn him and his cute smile and amazing eyes and fit body and and and :( I think you got my point. I couldn't believe in love, I just couldn't. I can't risk it.
But a voice in the back of my head said, "live a little. you deserve it"
I'm just gonna go with the flow...
It was half past twelve and it was settled, we're going to my grandma's place for lunch which is in like 2 hours.
It's been half an hour and I'm still sitting indian style 'mtrb3a' towards my closet trying to decide what to wear.
I can't wear something expensive, they'd think I was trying so hard. And I can't wear something mehhh cause they'd think that I didn't care. Ughhhhhhh being a girl sucks! Big time.
My eyes were focused on the pile on clothes that were on the floor. As if an outfit would magically pop in my hands. I want superpowers :(
"Noughaaaa shtsween?" 3aboud said, suddenly appearing at my door, scaring the heck out of me.
"way 7beebe khra3tny" I said while clutching my chest, breathing unevenly. "Oh and i'm looking for something to wear, help me?" I gave him one of my own puppy dog eyes. I was told that they were irresistible.
"ugh fine if I must"
Boy that kid sure knows fashion! He picked a gorgeous outfit! -in the end- but the skirt was longer and without the beanie.
"thank you so much babyyyy" I gave him a wet kiss on the cheek. Enjoying watching him get all disgusted::
I looked at the clock and saw that it was 1 o'clock already:o
Crap I need to get ready fast! I told 3aboud to tell Mila to dress him and I went to take a quick shower.
After blowing my hair I was glad to see that it was naturally straight and I only had my makeup left.
While putting on mascara my phone started ringing and answered it without checking the caller I.D thinking it was Nawal but I was wrong.
"Nawal tara e7na khl9na yala ta3lay" Nawal was our ride there since I don't remember where they lived.
"affaa you actually thought I was Nawal? I'm hurt" a deep voice startled me making me drop my mascara.
"Khaled you scared me! Wait where did you get my number?"
"save the questions for the car, I'm coming in 10 minutes"
Huh? "wait wait, Nawal is my ride not you" I was hoping that he'd pick me up but I had to point that out.
"yeah she just called me malha khelg so she told me to get you" I did my happy dance \o/
"well fine then.. Bye"
"haha bye beautiful" his manly laugh created butterflies in my stomach.
After I hanged up with him, I finished my makeup and doubled checked on how I looked and wend to 3aboud's room.
What I found broke my heart into small pieces. I found him laying on his stomach, his eyes so focused on the picture he was holding. I knew what that picture was.
It was a picture of my mom.
He was too young to understand what happened that I told him that mama went away but she'll be back. Of course I was lying, she will never come back.
I felt a vibration in my purse and I knew I had an incoming call. And when I looked at the caller I.D it was Khaled and he texted me saying that he was outside.
Since I was standing outside his door I gentling knocked on it, announcing that I was there cause he told me once that he wanted his privacy and didn't want anyone to go inside his room without knocking first. That kid is so mature. We both were too mature for our ages. I blame all the incidents that happened to us.
When he heard the knocks he quickly hid the picture underneath his pillow. He doesn't like to show his weakness, 6ale3 3la his big sister. <3
"yala 7beebe it's time to go" I said in a gentle voice pretending that I didn't notice what happened.
"okay yala nougha" he said while jumping off his bed and came to hold my hand. He was "nervous" but so was I. I wasn't nervous about my grandma's place but I was nervous of being in Khaled's car.
I could tell 3aboud was mad when he saw Khaled standing outside waiting for us in the hot summery weather. Yeah, I forgot to mention, he gets jealous over any male he sees approaching me. He thinks all males are beasts of course he was an exception.
I swear my fingers were going to fall off any second now that's how hard he's holding my hand. But all thoughts of pain went out of my ear when I saw Khaled. His biceps looked fit not the big muscular type but the hot type. And he was pushing his hair away from his forehead. He still didn't notice us well of course not until Abdullah 'introduced himself'
"Hi I'm nougha's big brother so stay away from her" he said while staring daggers at Khaled. I swear if looks could kill he'd be six frets under ground..
"oh hey there big guy my name is Khaled and i'm your cousin" he said while giving him a half smile, showing his deep dimple. Man do I like a guy who has dimples.
3abouds eyes had doubt in them so h turned to me saying "nougha is he my cousin?" that's when Khaled noticed me. FINALLY.
I couldn't help but giggle, "yes 3aboud he is"
His face changed from anger to happy in a matter of seconds. And he opened the back door of the car and put on his seltbelt.
"wow" he whispered while looking at me from my feet to my face.
I was so shy and my red face became redder, if that was possible. "um we should go we don't wanna be late" I said while looking at the ground and walking towards the car.
I felt butterflies in my stomach when he opened the car door for me, still in a daze. God bless Abdullah's fashion choice.
The car ride was silent so he started small talking with 3aboud and I could tell that Abdullah liked him from the way he opened up to him.
Half way there 3aboud fell asleep so it was just Khaled and I. I started a conversation with him cause I was so close to falling asleep myself.
"soo you in uni or what? And how come I just found out that I have a cousin called Khaled?"
"woah slow down beautiful, one question at a time" he said while throwing me his one million dollar smile.
"hehe sorry" I smiled shyly.
"it's fine so to answer your first question I'm gonna be attending gust this September and for the second one I just came back from the states, me and my parents lived there for seven years so..."
Oh god what a coincidence that we will be at the same uni? I was going to ask him some more questions when he accidentally went across a mu6ba without slowing down. Thank god it was a small one but I did bump my head into the cars roof.
But after a few seconds we started laughing like crazy cause of my screams when we hit the mu6ba::
But his laugh died off when he saw something and not just any something, he saw one of my bruises that was on one of my thighs.
Apparently when my head hit the roof my skirt lifted a bit and showed them.
"NOURA WHAT IS THAT?" he said, voice angry and eyes wide open in shock and fright.
"uhh I can explain...." I said while covering them.
I'm not gonna get out of this one so easily.
-Comments
@Chanceinloveq8
Saturday, 12 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world. Chapter 6
I was too shock to form words much less move! I was literally standing in the middle of the road, feet glued to the floor. My mind was wandering off until a car horn interrupted my thoughts.
"Ekhty mu nawya tt7rkain?" A middle aged man told me with all respect but I could tell he was slightly ticked off.
"Ugh asfa" my face was tomato red at that moment. I started walking with my head towards the floor hoping that Khaled and Nawal, my second cousin won't see me. But we can't always get what we want.
"AMBAIH NOURAAA?:o" she yelled with her mouth shaped like an o. When she confirmed that it was me, her cousin she started running out to hug me leaving Khaled with his eyes wide open.
I swear I almost fell from the power of her hug. "Um, hey Nawal..." The last time I've seen her it was last eid. We don't really go to the zwaras or yam3at. Oh, I wonder why :o
"Omg, no time no see! Laish ma tyeee elzwarat?!" She said while jumping around. Man, that girl is so energetic.
"Uh I was busy?" I really don't know how to make up excuses. Good thing she bought it::
"Oh no worries lazim tyeen this weekend. Everyone misses you and 3aboud:(" she puppy dog eyed me.
Well since the beast is out of town, why not? "Yeah sure, this Friday. We'll be there"
"YAAAAY oh how rude of me! I didn't introduce our cousin!" She hit her forehead and turned towards Khaled woah, hold on! Did she say OUR cousin?
I don't remember a Khaled in our family-.-
She went to him and pulled him for him hand. "Come on. Don't be shy. Noura Khaled, Khaled Noura"
He snapped out of it, "we actually met before...but hi again" he was scratching the back of his head like the cute guy he is. Noura snap out of it!
"Yeah...." I don't even know what to say?
"Sooooooooo tell me know did you guys meet?"
Us both said "it's a long story" when we both noticed that we locked eyes and I started giggling shyly.
Nawal had an incoming call so she left us alone but not without winking at me. Gurl does she has a plan in mind. She used to me a matchmaker:: and I guess she still is.
"So... 6l3na n9eer 7ag ba3ath?" Khaled said to me, almost smirking.
"Eeh sheft eshloun elkuwait 9gheera?"
"Haha eehh. Ta3lay laish yaya?" He asked while raising one of his eyebrows.
"7ram aye ya3ne:p? Ou yaya abe eggs"
He opened his mouth to answer me but Nawal interrupted us saying "boooo I have too go. Errands"
"Ohh 7asafa:(" i said faking my sadness. I'd like to be alone with him..
"Shrayich tyeen Elyoum baitna?" She said.
"I'd love too! But I gotta babysit 3aboud:( "I said disappointed that I couldn't go.
"Oh no worries bring him with you!"
"Madree... I'll call you later to tell you or I'm coming or not" we exchanged numbers and then left but not without also giving me another wink.
The atmosphere was thick. It was so awkward.
"Soooo bye!"I said almost running inside the jam3eya trying to get away from Khaled and the mixed feelings.
"Hey wait up!" He was catching up to me. "Shda3wa en7shtay"
"Wait pfffft ma en7sht" like I said, I suck at making up excuses.
"Whatever you say, beautiful." He winked then left.
WHAT IS UP WITH THE WINKING TODAY:)
But oh my, he is yummy. I'll allow that thought and that thought only.
I think I'm having my first crush.
-Comments
@chanceinloveq8
"Ekhty mu nawya tt7rkain?" A middle aged man told me with all respect but I could tell he was slightly ticked off.
"Ugh asfa" my face was tomato red at that moment. I started walking with my head towards the floor hoping that Khaled and Nawal, my second cousin won't see me. But we can't always get what we want.
"AMBAIH NOURAAA?:o" she yelled with her mouth shaped like an o. When she confirmed that it was me, her cousin she started running out to hug me leaving Khaled with his eyes wide open.
I swear I almost fell from the power of her hug. "Um, hey Nawal..." The last time I've seen her it was last eid. We don't really go to the zwaras or yam3at. Oh, I wonder why :o
"Omg, no time no see! Laish ma tyeee elzwarat?!" She said while jumping around. Man, that girl is so energetic.
"Uh I was busy?" I really don't know how to make up excuses. Good thing she bought it::
"Oh no worries lazim tyeen this weekend. Everyone misses you and 3aboud:(" she puppy dog eyed me.
Well since the beast is out of town, why not? "Yeah sure, this Friday. We'll be there"
"YAAAAY oh how rude of me! I didn't introduce our cousin!" She hit her forehead and turned towards Khaled woah, hold on! Did she say OUR cousin?
I don't remember a Khaled in our family-.-
She went to him and pulled him for him hand. "Come on. Don't be shy. Noura Khaled, Khaled Noura"
He snapped out of it, "we actually met before...but hi again" he was scratching the back of his head like the cute guy he is. Noura snap out of it!
"Yeah...." I don't even know what to say?
"Sooooooooo tell me know did you guys meet?"
Us both said "it's a long story" when we both noticed that we locked eyes and I started giggling shyly.
Nawal had an incoming call so she left us alone but not without winking at me. Gurl does she has a plan in mind. She used to me a matchmaker:: and I guess she still is.
"So... 6l3na n9eer 7ag ba3ath?" Khaled said to me, almost smirking.
"Eeh sheft eshloun elkuwait 9gheera?"
"Haha eehh. Ta3lay laish yaya?" He asked while raising one of his eyebrows.
"7ram aye ya3ne:p? Ou yaya abe eggs"
He opened his mouth to answer me but Nawal interrupted us saying "boooo I have too go. Errands"
"Ohh 7asafa:(" i said faking my sadness. I'd like to be alone with him..
"Shrayich tyeen Elyoum baitna?" She said.
"I'd love too! But I gotta babysit 3aboud:( "I said disappointed that I couldn't go.
"Oh no worries bring him with you!"
"Madree... I'll call you later to tell you or I'm coming or not" we exchanged numbers and then left but not without also giving me another wink.
The atmosphere was thick. It was so awkward.
"Soooo bye!"I said almost running inside the jam3eya trying to get away from Khaled and the mixed feelings.
"Hey wait up!" He was catching up to me. "Shda3wa en7shtay"
"Wait pfffft ma en7sht" like I said, I suck at making up excuses.
"Whatever you say, beautiful." He winked then left.
WHAT IS UP WITH THE WINKING TODAY:)
But oh my, he is yummy. I'll allow that thought and that thought only.
I think I'm having my first crush.
-Comments
@chanceinloveq8
Friday, 11 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world. Chapter 5
After half an hour with me crying, I stopped. While I was wiping away my tears I thought that there is no reason for me to cry now what's done is done no need to dwell on the past.
Mila noticed my sudden mood change, "So you are back to being our Noura?" she said while smiling.
"She never left Mila" I said while smiling also. Oh dammit! I forgot to check on 3aboud, he's probably freaking out now! Way to go, Noura:)
My legs started wobbling as soon as I stepped on them. I forgot about last night's injuries when my mind remembered 3aboud.
I was too shy to ask for help but I had no choice, I had Mila help me up the stairs and walk me to the room were he was sleeping in. The second I opened the door he came rushing out to hug me, almost making me fall in the process.
"Woooah calm down tiger shfeeik" I said while wrapping my arms around his shoulders.
"*sniff* I thought you left *sniff* me *sniff*" and he stuffed his face even more into my bruised tummy, but I didn't complain.
"7beeby look at me" he nodded his head as in no "baby please look at me?" He hesitated but looked at me never less.
I took a hold of his face like my mom did when she was going to leave me, us. Only difference is that I'm not going to leave him, ever.
"I will never ever ever ever ever leave you, fhamt?" I was looking deep into his light brown innocent eyes "fahamt?!" I asked again hoping for a reply.
"Fahamt" he said while leaning in to kiss my cheek and be also said something in my before he leaned away something I wished I heard wrong.
He said, "I love you, mama"
I was going to answer him telling him not to call me that when our house phone started ringing.
My hands stopped moving, my eyes were about to fall from its sockets, my legs started shaking. Why you ask? Cause there's only one person who calls our house phone. Only one.
The beast.
I forced my legs to move towards the phone, my shaking hands leaning to grab ahold of the handle.
"Alo?" His deep, evil voice echoed in my ear.
I felt as of my tongue was literally tied.
"Aloooo?" He said again but this time I replied.
"Uhh hala..." I said, suddenly having troubles with my voice.
"Hala hala eb Nwaira" he said, his voice suddenly went from evil to cheerful.. Maybe it's not him, he couldn't have.
"Um, mnu?" I felt stupid while asking that for I knew who it was but I wanted him to confirm it..
"Haw ya3ne mnu? Ubouch!" He laughed, actually laughed... I think he's sick or had amnesia or something.
"Eeh hala bghait shay..."
"Wallah bnayte bs dag bagoulich ene bsafer elyoum Germany for work ou I already packed my stuff ou now raye7 elma6ar"
SOMEBODY PINCH ME, LIKE SERIOUSLY!
"Baba 9ej?:D shkther btg3ad??" I couldn't wipe that smile off my face!
"Two months" omg I'm going to die from the happiness. "You're going to be alright 9a7?" He said, his tone worried.
"YES! Ugh I mean hehe yeah sure pffftt" I was blabbing, but can you blame me?! IM BEAST FREE FOR TWO MONTHS!
"Ashwa yala 7beebty I gotta go" "byeeeeee have fun!"
I was doing my happy dance in the corridor and at the middle of it I noticed that 3aboud was staring at me, eyes wide open in shock!
Oops:$
I picked him up and spun around with him in my arms and started to sing "WHO RUN THE WORLD? GIRLS" random I know::::
When I went downstairs I started making pancakes, waffles, orange juice and everything! When I'm happy I cook....
"Hey Mila, do we have eggs?" I said while putting the wrappers in the trash. "Noo I forgot to tell you:("
"That's okay, I'll go now you guys eat"
I quickly went upstairs and wore my baby pink juicy sweats and put my hair in a ponytail and left.
A part of me, the logical part was thinking about my fathers departure and the other part, the reckless one is hoping I'd see Khaled again. Stop right now missy! No more boy thoughts.
But I did see him and he wasn't alone.
He was with a girl. Not just any girl but my cousin.
What a coincidence:)
-Comments?
@chanceinloveq8
Mila noticed my sudden mood change, "So you are back to being our Noura?" she said while smiling.
"She never left Mila" I said while smiling also. Oh dammit! I forgot to check on 3aboud, he's probably freaking out now! Way to go, Noura:)
My legs started wobbling as soon as I stepped on them. I forgot about last night's injuries when my mind remembered 3aboud.
I was too shy to ask for help but I had no choice, I had Mila help me up the stairs and walk me to the room were he was sleeping in. The second I opened the door he came rushing out to hug me, almost making me fall in the process.
"Woooah calm down tiger shfeeik" I said while wrapping my arms around his shoulders.
"*sniff* I thought you left *sniff* me *sniff*" and he stuffed his face even more into my bruised tummy, but I didn't complain.
"7beeby look at me" he nodded his head as in no "baby please look at me?" He hesitated but looked at me never less.
I took a hold of his face like my mom did when she was going to leave me, us. Only difference is that I'm not going to leave him, ever.
"I will never ever ever ever ever leave you, fhamt?" I was looking deep into his light brown innocent eyes "fahamt?!" I asked again hoping for a reply.
"Fahamt" he said while leaning in to kiss my cheek and be also said something in my before he leaned away something I wished I heard wrong.
He said, "I love you, mama"
I was going to answer him telling him not to call me that when our house phone started ringing.
My hands stopped moving, my eyes were about to fall from its sockets, my legs started shaking. Why you ask? Cause there's only one person who calls our house phone. Only one.
The beast.
I forced my legs to move towards the phone, my shaking hands leaning to grab ahold of the handle.
"Alo?" His deep, evil voice echoed in my ear.
I felt as of my tongue was literally tied.
"Aloooo?" He said again but this time I replied.
"Uhh hala..." I said, suddenly having troubles with my voice.
"Hala hala eb Nwaira" he said, his voice suddenly went from evil to cheerful.. Maybe it's not him, he couldn't have.
"Um, mnu?" I felt stupid while asking that for I knew who it was but I wanted him to confirm it..
"Haw ya3ne mnu? Ubouch!" He laughed, actually laughed... I think he's sick or had amnesia or something.
"Eeh hala bghait shay..."
"Wallah bnayte bs dag bagoulich ene bsafer elyoum Germany for work ou I already packed my stuff ou now raye7 elma6ar"
SOMEBODY PINCH ME, LIKE SERIOUSLY!
"Baba 9ej?:D shkther btg3ad??" I couldn't wipe that smile off my face!
"Two months" omg I'm going to die from the happiness. "You're going to be alright 9a7?" He said, his tone worried.
"YES! Ugh I mean hehe yeah sure pffftt" I was blabbing, but can you blame me?! IM BEAST FREE FOR TWO MONTHS!
"Ashwa yala 7beebty I gotta go" "byeeeeee have fun!"
I was doing my happy dance in the corridor and at the middle of it I noticed that 3aboud was staring at me, eyes wide open in shock!
Oops:$
I picked him up and spun around with him in my arms and started to sing "WHO RUN THE WORLD? GIRLS" random I know::::
When I went downstairs I started making pancakes, waffles, orange juice and everything! When I'm happy I cook....
"Hey Mila, do we have eggs?" I said while putting the wrappers in the trash. "Noo I forgot to tell you:("
"That's okay, I'll go now you guys eat"
I quickly went upstairs and wore my baby pink juicy sweats and put my hair in a ponytail and left.
A part of me, the logical part was thinking about my fathers departure and the other part, the reckless one is hoping I'd see Khaled again. Stop right now missy! No more boy thoughts.
But I did see him and he wasn't alone.
He was with a girl. Not just any girl but my cousin.
What a coincidence:)
-Comments?
@chanceinloveq8
Thursday, 10 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world. Chapter 4
Khaled's p.o.v "point of view":
I was surrounded by dozens of males, their voices were loud, yet I couldn't help but allow my mind to wander off..
I was sitting in my best friends Dwaniya, some were playing card games, some were watching the match, some were eating. I should try to interact with them but this time I didn't, I simply thought of one person, a female. I couldn't help it, I haven't seen someone that was so beautiful, so innocent, so afraid..
Call me a creep but I did follow her home, just to make sure she got there okay. Her beautiful eyes had so many secrets swimming in them, her posture showed that she was scared of anyone, males exactly. My train of thoughts ended when I saw something. Something un usual.
She was leaning down to get her wallet from the cars floor and her maxi dress came up just a little bit showing her ankle, her bruised ankle.
And that's when I knew that that beautiful girl had a troubled life.
I, Khaled alx am into a girl. And I plan on making her mine asap.
Back to Noura's p.o.v:
I knew it was morning but I didn't have the energy to move a muscle, the hot sun rays were hitting my face almost making it impossible for me to go back to sleep but I knew I had to get up before 3aboud wakes up and finds me like this.
I tried to lift my self up but ended up falling right back on the hard floor, I held in my cries of pain cause I knew once I've let them out I'd have a mental breakdown.
After my third attempt, I gave up. Five minutes later I heard our front door being opened and I prayed and prayed that it wasn't Mila but god did not answer my prayer this time.
"good morin- NOURAAAA WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?" Our housekeeper, Mila began questioning me.
"Ugh, nothing I just fell. Can you help me?" I covered it up with lies but she was far to smart to believe them.
"Noura, these are bruises as if somebody hit you..." she said those last three words in a whispered voice.
"No no shaku I mean no! I fell nobody hit me haha" I was sitting on the couch now thanks to Mila but I wished that the ground would open up and swallow me whole.
"Don't lie to me, Noura" she sounded like my mom and deep down she was almost like a mom to me. Almost.
My eyes started welling up and I couldn't stop the tears from flowing. "It was horrible Mila he's so horrible" and I broke down and threw my arms around her and began crying my eyes out.
"there there" she said while patting my back, "tell me everything" and I did, from mama leaving us till last night.
I could tell that she was shocked, her eyes said so.
"Noura you have to go to the police!" she said, eyes wide open.
I grew angry, "NO!"
"why not?!?!"
"you forgot about Abdullah, if I go to the police and have him locked in jail he'll be sent to a foster home. He already lost his mother and father, I'm the only family he has left!" I told her, my eyes begging her to understand.
"Fine, but this is not good! You can't live your life in fear"
"for Abdullah, I'll take it all in just so he can have a normal life."
She hugged me again.
And i fell asleep for I allowed myself to to pretend that I was in the comfort of my mothers arms.
For once.
-Comments?
@chanceinloveq8
P.S sorry if it's short:(
I was surrounded by dozens of males, their voices were loud, yet I couldn't help but allow my mind to wander off..
I was sitting in my best friends Dwaniya, some were playing card games, some were watching the match, some were eating. I should try to interact with them but this time I didn't, I simply thought of one person, a female. I couldn't help it, I haven't seen someone that was so beautiful, so innocent, so afraid..
Call me a creep but I did follow her home, just to make sure she got there okay. Her beautiful eyes had so many secrets swimming in them, her posture showed that she was scared of anyone, males exactly. My train of thoughts ended when I saw something. Something un usual.
She was leaning down to get her wallet from the cars floor and her maxi dress came up just a little bit showing her ankle, her bruised ankle.
And that's when I knew that that beautiful girl had a troubled life.
I, Khaled alx am into a girl. And I plan on making her mine asap.
Back to Noura's p.o.v:
I knew it was morning but I didn't have the energy to move a muscle, the hot sun rays were hitting my face almost making it impossible for me to go back to sleep but I knew I had to get up before 3aboud wakes up and finds me like this.
I tried to lift my self up but ended up falling right back on the hard floor, I held in my cries of pain cause I knew once I've let them out I'd have a mental breakdown.
After my third attempt, I gave up. Five minutes later I heard our front door being opened and I prayed and prayed that it wasn't Mila but god did not answer my prayer this time.
"good morin- NOURAAAA WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?" Our housekeeper, Mila began questioning me.
"Ugh, nothing I just fell. Can you help me?" I covered it up with lies but she was far to smart to believe them.
"Noura, these are bruises as if somebody hit you..." she said those last three words in a whispered voice.
"No no shaku I mean no! I fell nobody hit me haha" I was sitting on the couch now thanks to Mila but I wished that the ground would open up and swallow me whole.
"Don't lie to me, Noura" she sounded like my mom and deep down she was almost like a mom to me. Almost.
My eyes started welling up and I couldn't stop the tears from flowing. "It was horrible Mila he's so horrible" and I broke down and threw my arms around her and began crying my eyes out.
"there there" she said while patting my back, "tell me everything" and I did, from mama leaving us till last night.
I could tell that she was shocked, her eyes said so.
"Noura you have to go to the police!" she said, eyes wide open.
I grew angry, "NO!"
"why not?!?!"
"you forgot about Abdullah, if I go to the police and have him locked in jail he'll be sent to a foster home. He already lost his mother and father, I'm the only family he has left!" I told her, my eyes begging her to understand.
"Fine, but this is not good! You can't live your life in fear"
"for Abdullah, I'll take it all in just so he can have a normal life."
She hugged me again.
And i fell asleep for I allowed myself to to pretend that I was in the comfort of my mothers arms.
For once.
-Comments?
@chanceinloveq8
P.S sorry if it's short:(
Tuesday, 8 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world. Chapter 3
I had a smile plastered on my face for hours, surprisingly I couldn't stop thinking about him, about Khaled.
When I came back home I helped Mila with carrying in the groceries and trying to make 3aboud less hyper.
"but but but noughaaaa -puppy dog eyes-:(" he said, his voice shaking.
Ugh I hated that I can't say no to him. But desperate times call for desperate measures...
"No buts Abdullah, If you wanna do something then we'll watch a movie"
I could tell he was upset but he'll live. "Fine"
"ekhtar a movie and I'll make the popcorn"
Now all traces of sadness magically left, "YAAAYYY"
After changing into my pjs and washing my face, I went down stairs to so I can spend some time with my babyyy
"sooooo what did you pick?"
"finding Nemo!" he said, his eyes glittery from the excitement.
"go figures" I said in a small voice.
"huh?" his eyes glued to the tv not even waiting for me.
"nothing 7beebe brou7 asawe popcorn" I said while walking towards the kitchen.
As I waited for the popcorn to finish, my mind wandered back to this morning's incident, why was I thinking about a total stranger. Why was I thinking of his smile, his laugh, his eyes...
The buzzing sound of the microwave brought me back to earth, the buttery smell attacked my nose as I opened the microwave door, my taste buds demanding that I start eating now. But I was patient.
It was half way through the movie but my eyes did not see it's ending that night. Why, you ask?
It was 5:30pm, Mila had to go early tonight cause of her sick son. I was okay with that thinking it was too early for 'him' to come. But boy, was I wrong.
At exactly 6:15 I heard the familiar car sound I heard every night, the sound that tells me that my nightmare is here. The beast has arrived.
My hands were shaking, they'd do that every night. You'd think that I've grown used to this but I'm not and I don't think I'll ever be.
3aboud was asleep on my lap, I couldn't think much less breathe! But I knew I had to do something.
I heard him fiddling with his keys p, trying to find the right now and that's when i grabbed ahold of my brother and ran as quickly as possible. When I reached the furtherest room that's when he came in the house yelling my name.
I tucked 3aboud in, kissed his forehead and then locked the room.
I felt as if my own legs were too heavy to carry me, my heart was beating at a fast pace but I knew I had to go downstairs otherwise he'd come up.
"NOURA OU 9MAKH TA9MKHICH" My own father shouted out, I could tell he was angry, no furious.
When I came down that's when I saw him, sitting on the sofa with his legs on the coffee table, his eyes watching my every move.
"ma trdeen" his voice felt like poison.
"um, ah asfa ma sma3tik.." my head to the ground, afraid of his reaction.
He got up, I could see his shadow approaching me, "gelt wain kentay?"
"um uhh, kent eb darii" my voice shaking.
"Shtsween eb darich?" he sounds as if he might burst into laughter any second now.
"wala shay" I said in a hushed tone.
He put his fingers under my chin and raised my head and lowered himself down so we'd be on the same level and leaned in until our noses touched.
I was deeply afraid, afraid of what might happen.
"liar" he whispered in my ear and slapped me so hard that I fell to the ground.
Thats 1 bruise.
He kicked my stomach, "ANA SHGAYLICH 3AN ECHETHB?"
2 bruises.
"YOU WERE TALKING TO YOUR BOYFRIEND ADREE FEEICH A BIT** JUST LIKE YOUR MOTHER" and another bruise.
It went on and in for 13 minutes, yes I counted.
I didn't dare to say anything. I think most of you will go like, why don't you defend yourself? One word answer; Abdullah.
I can't risk anything to happen to him, he knows he's my biggest weakness.
And for 3aboud, I shall take it all in.
When he was finally done he gave me one last blow and spited on me. "so worthless" he said, my own father ladies and gentlemen.
The moment he left I just curled into a ball, not having the energy to lift myself off the ground and cried.
Cried for my mothers absence.
Cried for my so called father.
I cried and cried and cried, but all I remember saying before I passed out is : الحمد الله على كل حال
-Comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
When I came back home I helped Mila with carrying in the groceries and trying to make 3aboud less hyper.
"but but but noughaaaa -puppy dog eyes-:(" he said, his voice shaking.
Ugh I hated that I can't say no to him. But desperate times call for desperate measures...
"No buts Abdullah, If you wanna do something then we'll watch a movie"
I could tell he was upset but he'll live. "Fine"
"ekhtar a movie and I'll make the popcorn"
Now all traces of sadness magically left, "YAAAYYY"
After changing into my pjs and washing my face, I went down stairs to so I can spend some time with my babyyy
"sooooo what did you pick?"
"finding Nemo!" he said, his eyes glittery from the excitement.
"go figures" I said in a small voice.
"huh?" his eyes glued to the tv not even waiting for me.
"nothing 7beebe brou7 asawe popcorn" I said while walking towards the kitchen.
As I waited for the popcorn to finish, my mind wandered back to this morning's incident, why was I thinking about a total stranger. Why was I thinking of his smile, his laugh, his eyes...
The buzzing sound of the microwave brought me back to earth, the buttery smell attacked my nose as I opened the microwave door, my taste buds demanding that I start eating now. But I was patient.
It was half way through the movie but my eyes did not see it's ending that night. Why, you ask?
It was 5:30pm, Mila had to go early tonight cause of her sick son. I was okay with that thinking it was too early for 'him' to come. But boy, was I wrong.
At exactly 6:15 I heard the familiar car sound I heard every night, the sound that tells me that my nightmare is here. The beast has arrived.
My hands were shaking, they'd do that every night. You'd think that I've grown used to this but I'm not and I don't think I'll ever be.
3aboud was asleep on my lap, I couldn't think much less breathe! But I knew I had to do something.
I heard him fiddling with his keys p, trying to find the right now and that's when i grabbed ahold of my brother and ran as quickly as possible. When I reached the furtherest room that's when he came in the house yelling my name.
I tucked 3aboud in, kissed his forehead and then locked the room.
I felt as if my own legs were too heavy to carry me, my heart was beating at a fast pace but I knew I had to go downstairs otherwise he'd come up.
"NOURA OU 9MAKH TA9MKHICH" My own father shouted out, I could tell he was angry, no furious.
When I came down that's when I saw him, sitting on the sofa with his legs on the coffee table, his eyes watching my every move.
"ma trdeen" his voice felt like poison.
"um, ah asfa ma sma3tik.." my head to the ground, afraid of his reaction.
He got up, I could see his shadow approaching me, "gelt wain kentay?"
"um uhh, kent eb darii" my voice shaking.
"Shtsween eb darich?" he sounds as if he might burst into laughter any second now.
"wala shay" I said in a hushed tone.
He put his fingers under my chin and raised my head and lowered himself down so we'd be on the same level and leaned in until our noses touched.
I was deeply afraid, afraid of what might happen.
"liar" he whispered in my ear and slapped me so hard that I fell to the ground.
Thats 1 bruise.
He kicked my stomach, "ANA SHGAYLICH 3AN ECHETHB?"
2 bruises.
"YOU WERE TALKING TO YOUR BOYFRIEND ADREE FEEICH A BIT** JUST LIKE YOUR MOTHER" and another bruise.
It went on and in for 13 minutes, yes I counted.
I didn't dare to say anything. I think most of you will go like, why don't you defend yourself? One word answer; Abdullah.
I can't risk anything to happen to him, he knows he's my biggest weakness.
And for 3aboud, I shall take it all in.
When he was finally done he gave me one last blow and spited on me. "so worthless" he said, my own father ladies and gentlemen.
The moment he left I just curled into a ball, not having the energy to lift myself off the ground and cried.
Cried for my mothers absence.
Cried for my so called father.
I cried and cried and cried, but all I remember saying before I passed out is : الحمد الله على كل حال
-Comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
Welcome to the cruel world chapter 2
Present day.
I could feel the sun rays hitting my cheek forcing me to wake up, the birds tweeting, happy to start their day. I envy them, I envy them for their wings, because they can literally fly if things got messy.
My mind was fully awake but my eyes wouldn't open, my muscles wouldn't move. The bruises from last night hurting me. Yes bruises as in plural. I could feel my door slowly opening and I prayed with all my heart that it wasn't him and God answered my prayer.
"nougha nougha -Noura in baby language::- yala goumayy" said Abdullah, my five year old brother.
"hummm morning sunshine:D" he jumped on my lap not knowing what was hidden beneath my clothes and I preferred it stayed that way, I held in my cries of pain and tried to concentrate on him and his smile.
"nougha yala ta3lay ta7at elrayal ra7" by rayal he means our father -sigh-
"yala 7beebe you go downstairs and sit with Mila and I'll come down" I kissed his forehead and waited for him to leave.
My eyes welled up with tears but I refuse to let them fall!
How did my life ended like this? I thought it was okay when my mom left that my dad would be okay..
I've always hated that I looked exactly like my mother and clearly so did he, on my 16th birthday that's when it all started, the abuse. At first it was only words but then words turned into actions...
For two years, two long years every night he'd come back home to eat dinner and if gets pissed over anything he takes it out on me and then leaves before sunrise.
One day he even dared to slap Abdullah cause he tried to pull him away from me, that's when I first punched him but later regretted doing so cause I ended in a really bad shape. Oh and if you're wondering where is the house keepers? Well we have one Mila who works from 7am till 7pm after that we're all alone...sadly.
But, my "dad" has done some nice things; he had me and abdullah in the best private schools so we can have a good education and now since i graudated from high school I'll be enrolling to gust this September -it was summer time and we're from a well known, wealthy family but sadly our secrets were hidden by a good name-
I snapped out of it and forced my self to get out of bed. I started limping my way to the bathroom so I can take my morning shower.
When i took my clothes off I started counting the bruises I got; 13. While putting my clothes in the dirty basket i accidentally looked at myself in the mirror. And boy did I not like what I saw. A brown haired girl was staring right back at me, her brown eyes lifeless, skin pale. I kept staring at that girl for a few minutes until one tear, just one which I allowed to stream down my face.
I took my shower, dried my hair and wore my blank sweatpants and my neon green sweater, I didn't want 3aboud to see my bruises. And went downstairs.
When I entered the kitchen, the scene that was in front of me warmed my heart. I saw 3aboud tilting his head backwards and laughing cause of what Mila is doing to her face, a smile crept on my face hoping that he'll never lose his ability to laugh.
"Nougha nougha ta3laaayy eat" he said while jumping from his chair and came towards me. "nougha ana aaana swait your favorite! Eggs:D"
"3afya 3la my boy" I said, while leaning towards him to kiss his cheek "and it looks extra yummy!"
"madam, we need stuff from the jam3eya and George is not here" Our housekeeper, Mila said.
"first it's Noura not madam and just give me the list and I'll go" I've always hated it when she called me madam, like I'm the woman in this house, well I am but that's something she should call my mother not me.
"Okay ma- I mean Noura, the list will be ready in a few minutes" she corrected her self when madam almost slipped out of her mouth.
"Okay, I'll go get ready. Yala 3aboud give me a kissy kiss" i said while giving him my cheek. "Umwaaaaaahhhhhhhh" oh man, that kid can give one hell of a sloppy kiss.
I kissed his forehead and went upstairs to get ready.
I went into my walk in closet to find my maxi dress and jeans jacket -you know the kind that's loose and let's you tie it under your chest or on your waist?- p.s outfit is in the back.
I put my hair into a messy bun and looked at myself in the mirror. Usually I'd skip the whole makeup thingy but I don't know what came on to me this time. I opened my makeup box that hasn't been touched for so long now and grabbed my liquid eyeliner and began to draw a cat eye. When I was done, I looked in the mirror and smiled, If anyone saw me they'd assume that I have a perfect life with the perfect parents and live in a perfect house, HA if only they knew.
"Noura Noura the list is ready!" Mila shouted at the end of the staircase.
"I'm coming!" I quickly grabbed my balenciaga wallet and my phone and left my room.
"I hope it's not so much Mil- what?" I noticed that she had her mouth wide open. "Um, hellooo Mila what's wrong with you?"
She snapped out of it "Oh, nothing nothing is just you look different. You look very maganda" -maganda means beautiful in Filipino-
"aww you look maganda-er :D yala I have to leave please keep an eye on Abdullah"
"No need to tell me, i've got it"
"Bye 3aboudiii umwaah" I gave him a flying kiss and left the house.
I grabbed the car keys for the Audi from our garage's cabinet and got in.
Aahh I missed driving, ever since I got my license two months ago I've only driven twice. I missed the rush I'd get when I speeded a little bit.
Before I knew it, I was already in our jam3eya's parking lot. When I got in and took a trolley I started reading the list.
Jben kraft, labna, toast, hamburgers, chicken nuggets, carrots, bananas and so the list goes on...
My trolley was almost full and I've still got a couple of things to bring.I was so absorbed at reading the remaining things that I didn't notice that a guy was walking in front of me until I bumped into him.
"oufff" the stranger said when we collided.
"I'm so so sorry ambaih wala ma sheftik ou ya3ne..." I was nervously babbling and he started laughing, he was laughing at me.
"shfeeich khla9 it's okay 7a9al khair:D" the nameless stranger said while smiling at me.
"Um, asfa again.." my cheeks were tomato red, god I hate that I easily blush.
"haha stop saying that" he said.
"Um, lazim arou7 bye and sorry again.."
I only walked like 5 steps then I heard him shout "HEY BEAUTIFUL YOU FORGOT YOUR WALLET"
-epic face palm!- i turned around to find him smiling that gorgeous smile of his.. Ugh Noura snap out of it, he's a stranger!
"Um, hehe sorry.." laman mdait eede he pulled my wallet back.
"what did I say about your sorry thing?" he said while raising his eyebrow.
"um, sor- I mean yeah..." I was growing impatient "can you please give me my wallet?"
"Sure eb shar6"
"which is?"
" I wanna know if this gorgeous girl has a name"
Here we go again with the blushing thing..
"um, it's Noura, now please give it to me" mdait eede waiting for him.
"such a beautiful name for a beautiful lady"
When he stretched his hand to give me my wallet, our fingers touched for a split second, that's when I gasped.
I quickly took my wallet and left with my trolley
"OH, AND NOURA"
I stopped in my tracks..
"My name is Khaled." and he left.
I smiled to myself and thought what a crazy guy you are, Khaled
-Comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
I could feel the sun rays hitting my cheek forcing me to wake up, the birds tweeting, happy to start their day. I envy them, I envy them for their wings, because they can literally fly if things got messy.
My mind was fully awake but my eyes wouldn't open, my muscles wouldn't move. The bruises from last night hurting me. Yes bruises as in plural. I could feel my door slowly opening and I prayed with all my heart that it wasn't him and God answered my prayer.
"nougha nougha -Noura in baby language::- yala goumayy" said Abdullah, my five year old brother.
"hummm morning sunshine:D" he jumped on my lap not knowing what was hidden beneath my clothes and I preferred it stayed that way, I held in my cries of pain and tried to concentrate on him and his smile.
"nougha yala ta3lay ta7at elrayal ra7" by rayal he means our father -sigh-
"yala 7beebe you go downstairs and sit with Mila and I'll come down" I kissed his forehead and waited for him to leave.
My eyes welled up with tears but I refuse to let them fall!
How did my life ended like this? I thought it was okay when my mom left that my dad would be okay..
I've always hated that I looked exactly like my mother and clearly so did he, on my 16th birthday that's when it all started, the abuse. At first it was only words but then words turned into actions...
For two years, two long years every night he'd come back home to eat dinner and if gets pissed over anything he takes it out on me and then leaves before sunrise.
One day he even dared to slap Abdullah cause he tried to pull him away from me, that's when I first punched him but later regretted doing so cause I ended in a really bad shape. Oh and if you're wondering where is the house keepers? Well we have one Mila who works from 7am till 7pm after that we're all alone...sadly.
But, my "dad" has done some nice things; he had me and abdullah in the best private schools so we can have a good education and now since i graudated from high school I'll be enrolling to gust this September -it was summer time and we're from a well known, wealthy family but sadly our secrets were hidden by a good name-
I snapped out of it and forced my self to get out of bed. I started limping my way to the bathroom so I can take my morning shower.
When i took my clothes off I started counting the bruises I got; 13. While putting my clothes in the dirty basket i accidentally looked at myself in the mirror. And boy did I not like what I saw. A brown haired girl was staring right back at me, her brown eyes lifeless, skin pale. I kept staring at that girl for a few minutes until one tear, just one which I allowed to stream down my face.
I took my shower, dried my hair and wore my blank sweatpants and my neon green sweater, I didn't want 3aboud to see my bruises. And went downstairs.
When I entered the kitchen, the scene that was in front of me warmed my heart. I saw 3aboud tilting his head backwards and laughing cause of what Mila is doing to her face, a smile crept on my face hoping that he'll never lose his ability to laugh.
"Nougha nougha ta3laaayy eat" he said while jumping from his chair and came towards me. "nougha ana aaana swait your favorite! Eggs:D"
"3afya 3la my boy" I said, while leaning towards him to kiss his cheek "and it looks extra yummy!"
"madam, we need stuff from the jam3eya and George is not here" Our housekeeper, Mila said.
"first it's Noura not madam and just give me the list and I'll go" I've always hated it when she called me madam, like I'm the woman in this house, well I am but that's something she should call my mother not me.
"Okay ma- I mean Noura, the list will be ready in a few minutes" she corrected her self when madam almost slipped out of her mouth.
"Okay, I'll go get ready. Yala 3aboud give me a kissy kiss" i said while giving him my cheek. "Umwaaaaaahhhhhhhh" oh man, that kid can give one hell of a sloppy kiss.
I kissed his forehead and went upstairs to get ready.
I went into my walk in closet to find my maxi dress and jeans jacket -you know the kind that's loose and let's you tie it under your chest or on your waist?- p.s outfit is in the back.
I put my hair into a messy bun and looked at myself in the mirror. Usually I'd skip the whole makeup thingy but I don't know what came on to me this time. I opened my makeup box that hasn't been touched for so long now and grabbed my liquid eyeliner and began to draw a cat eye. When I was done, I looked in the mirror and smiled, If anyone saw me they'd assume that I have a perfect life with the perfect parents and live in a perfect house, HA if only they knew.
"Noura Noura the list is ready!" Mila shouted at the end of the staircase.
"I'm coming!" I quickly grabbed my balenciaga wallet and my phone and left my room.
"I hope it's not so much Mil- what?" I noticed that she had her mouth wide open. "Um, hellooo Mila what's wrong with you?"
She snapped out of it "Oh, nothing nothing is just you look different. You look very maganda" -maganda means beautiful in Filipino-
"aww you look maganda-er :D yala I have to leave please keep an eye on Abdullah"
"No need to tell me, i've got it"
"Bye 3aboudiii umwaah" I gave him a flying kiss and left the house.
I grabbed the car keys for the Audi from our garage's cabinet and got in.
Aahh I missed driving, ever since I got my license two months ago I've only driven twice. I missed the rush I'd get when I speeded a little bit.
Before I knew it, I was already in our jam3eya's parking lot. When I got in and took a trolley I started reading the list.
Jben kraft, labna, toast, hamburgers, chicken nuggets, carrots, bananas and so the list goes on...
My trolley was almost full and I've still got a couple of things to bring.I was so absorbed at reading the remaining things that I didn't notice that a guy was walking in front of me until I bumped into him.
"oufff" the stranger said when we collided.
"I'm so so sorry ambaih wala ma sheftik ou ya3ne..." I was nervously babbling and he started laughing, he was laughing at me.
"shfeeich khla9 it's okay 7a9al khair:D" the nameless stranger said while smiling at me.
"Um, asfa again.." my cheeks were tomato red, god I hate that I easily blush.
"haha stop saying that" he said.
"Um, lazim arou7 bye and sorry again.."
I only walked like 5 steps then I heard him shout "HEY BEAUTIFUL YOU FORGOT YOUR WALLET"
-epic face palm!- i turned around to find him smiling that gorgeous smile of his.. Ugh Noura snap out of it, he's a stranger!
"Um, hehe sorry.." laman mdait eede he pulled my wallet back.
"what did I say about your sorry thing?" he said while raising his eyebrow.
"um, sor- I mean yeah..." I was growing impatient "can you please give me my wallet?"
"Sure eb shar6"
"which is?"
" I wanna know if this gorgeous girl has a name"
Here we go again with the blushing thing..
"um, it's Noura, now please give it to me" mdait eede waiting for him.
"such a beautiful name for a beautiful lady"
When he stretched his hand to give me my wallet, our fingers touched for a split second, that's when I gasped.
I quickly took my wallet and left with my trolley
"OH, AND NOURA"
I stopped in my tracks..
"My name is Khaled." and he left.
I smiled to myself and thought what a crazy guy you are, Khaled
-Comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
Monday, 7 January 2013
Welcome to the cruel world Chapter 1
Flashback 5 years ago.
I was sitting in my room trying to block out my parents yelling, trying to comfort my 1 year old brother. Trying to comfort my self. I've grown used to this. It has been some sort of a routine in my life that I'd actually feel that something was missing in my day if my parents didn't fight. Usually they'd fight and fight and fight till it ended with my mom leaving for a bit then my dad rushing off after her filling her mind with his lies but not today.
-bang bang-
"Noura open the door bser3a 7beebty!" said my panicking mother. I rushed from where I am to open the lock and allow her in. She barged in so quickly that her elbow collided with my face.
"Noura!! I'm so sorry i'm sorry!" she hugged me so tight as if it would be our last hug ever. Little did I know that it was.
After a few minutes she calmed down and her heart beats were back to normal, kinda.
"Noura look at me" she held my face in her hands. Her eyes were serious, all traces of tears gone.
"I want you to listen carefully okay?" I nodded. "I want you to take care of your brother, okay??" I nodded again but this time, my eyes were full of fear.
My brother, Abdullah's crying snapped us back to reality. She turned her face towards him, her eyes full of moist substances, she looked vulnerable, my mother ladies and gentlemen looked scared out of her mind.
She carefully released my face and walked towards his crib. As soon as she held him she started sobbing and it broke my heart to pieces.
I may be 13 but my parents situation forced me to grow older. I became my mothers mom. When she cried at night I used to hold her till she falls asleep. I wasn't stupid I knew my dad had "affairs"
I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn't realize that my mom started packing some stuff and putting them in a small duffel bag.
"mama what are you doing?" my voice cracked, afraid of her answer.
"I'm leaving" there it goes, the remaining bits of my heart broke into small pieces.
"what do you mean you're leaving?!" I was angry, no scratch that, I was furious!
"Noura, I can't stay here" her voice was different, she was different. She gave me her back, probably scared to face me cause she knows what she's doing is super wrong!
"mama please fahmeene" I refuse to cry. I've been so strong for years now and I won't break down now.
"I have to leave!" she was shouting but still had her back to me.
My brother started crying again when she held him she was expecting that he'll calm down once he smells her scent but he did the exact opposite.
"3aboud khla9 shush" he wouldn't stop crying. I needed to interfere.
"Mama give him to me" her eyes held doubt in them but she gave him to me.
And guess what? The second I held him, he stopped crying and went back to sleep.
When he turned 3 months that's when she started going out a lot, leaving Abdullah in the hands of our Filipino housekeeper, so I stepped in, started watching online videos on how to change a baby's diaper and make a bottle. I was the one who he shared his first steps with, his first word, his first everything.
I knew she was shocked that her own baby boy didn't recognize her but I wouldn't blame him.
I then noticed something; the house was quite..
"mama wain baba?" it took me a lot of effort to say baba instead of him.
"ubouich 6la3" she had sadness in her eyes but that was covered with anger now.
"enzain meta bnrou7?:D" I carefully put Abdullah down and headed for my closet.
"ugh um Noura 7beebty" she was stuttering, that meant she was hiding something from me.
"what?" I was growing impatient. When I looked at her she was rubbing her hands and looking anywhere but me.
"you'renotcomingwithme" she said it too fast, way to fast.
"huh? Say it again, this time slower.."
She looked me in the eyes and said "you are not coming with me"
I swear it was liked someone poked my eyes with a fork and stabbed me in the heart repeatedly.
"wait, sheno?? What do you mean we're not coming with you?? You're just going to walk out?? Just like that without us?" I said those last two words with so much sadness.
"Noura you don't understand" her eyes were almost begging me to listen but I've heard enough.
"THEN MAKE ME UNDERSTAND!"
....
Silence
I was going to break down any second now, "I deserve an explanation mama"
Her next words made me so angry that I almost saw red "you wouldn't understa-"
"don't you dare mother, don't"
I was so focused on trying to keep myself calm that I didn't notice that she had her bags ready or when she kissed my brothers forehead to bid him farewell or the fact that she left the house without saying goodbye to me, her daughter.
She left without an explanation. She left her husband. She left the house. She left her 1 year old son, she left me.
I was sitting in my room trying to block out my parents yelling, trying to comfort my 1 year old brother. Trying to comfort my self. I've grown used to this. It has been some sort of a routine in my life that I'd actually feel that something was missing in my day if my parents didn't fight. Usually they'd fight and fight and fight till it ended with my mom leaving for a bit then my dad rushing off after her filling her mind with his lies but not today.
-bang bang-
"Noura open the door bser3a 7beebty!" said my panicking mother. I rushed from where I am to open the lock and allow her in. She barged in so quickly that her elbow collided with my face.
"Noura!! I'm so sorry i'm sorry!" she hugged me so tight as if it would be our last hug ever. Little did I know that it was.
After a few minutes she calmed down and her heart beats were back to normal, kinda.
"Noura look at me" she held my face in her hands. Her eyes were serious, all traces of tears gone.
"I want you to listen carefully okay?" I nodded. "I want you to take care of your brother, okay??" I nodded again but this time, my eyes were full of fear.
My brother, Abdullah's crying snapped us back to reality. She turned her face towards him, her eyes full of moist substances, she looked vulnerable, my mother ladies and gentlemen looked scared out of her mind.
She carefully released my face and walked towards his crib. As soon as she held him she started sobbing and it broke my heart to pieces.
I may be 13 but my parents situation forced me to grow older. I became my mothers mom. When she cried at night I used to hold her till she falls asleep. I wasn't stupid I knew my dad had "affairs"
I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn't realize that my mom started packing some stuff and putting them in a small duffel bag.
"mama what are you doing?" my voice cracked, afraid of her answer.
"I'm leaving" there it goes, the remaining bits of my heart broke into small pieces.
"what do you mean you're leaving?!" I was angry, no scratch that, I was furious!
"Noura, I can't stay here" her voice was different, she was different. She gave me her back, probably scared to face me cause she knows what she's doing is super wrong!
"mama please fahmeene" I refuse to cry. I've been so strong for years now and I won't break down now.
"I have to leave!" she was shouting but still had her back to me.
My brother started crying again when she held him she was expecting that he'll calm down once he smells her scent but he did the exact opposite.
"3aboud khla9 shush" he wouldn't stop crying. I needed to interfere.
"Mama give him to me" her eyes held doubt in them but she gave him to me.
And guess what? The second I held him, he stopped crying and went back to sleep.
When he turned 3 months that's when she started going out a lot, leaving Abdullah in the hands of our Filipino housekeeper, so I stepped in, started watching online videos on how to change a baby's diaper and make a bottle. I was the one who he shared his first steps with, his first word, his first everything.
I knew she was shocked that her own baby boy didn't recognize her but I wouldn't blame him.
I then noticed something; the house was quite..
"mama wain baba?" it took me a lot of effort to say baba instead of him.
"ubouich 6la3" she had sadness in her eyes but that was covered with anger now.
"enzain meta bnrou7?:D" I carefully put Abdullah down and headed for my closet.
"ugh um Noura 7beebty" she was stuttering, that meant she was hiding something from me.
"what?" I was growing impatient. When I looked at her she was rubbing her hands and looking anywhere but me.
"you'renotcomingwithme" she said it too fast, way to fast.
"huh? Say it again, this time slower.."
She looked me in the eyes and said "you are not coming with me"
I swear it was liked someone poked my eyes with a fork and stabbed me in the heart repeatedly.
"wait, sheno?? What do you mean we're not coming with you?? You're just going to walk out?? Just like that without us?" I said those last two words with so much sadness.
"Noura you don't understand" her eyes were almost begging me to listen but I've heard enough.
"THEN MAKE ME UNDERSTAND!"
....
Silence
I was going to break down any second now, "I deserve an explanation mama"
Her next words made me so angry that I almost saw red "you wouldn't understa-"
"don't you dare mother, don't"
I was so focused on trying to keep myself calm that I didn't notice that she had her bags ready or when she kissed my brothers forehead to bid him farewell or the fact that she left the house without saying goodbye to me, her daughter.
She left without an explanation. She left her husband. She left the house. She left her 1 year old son, she left me.
Welcome to the cruel world.
This story will talk about abuse and the lack of love. How a teenager took care of her younger sibling. How their 'father' would abuse her and she'd take it all in without saying anything for the sake of her brother. Where is her mom you ask? She left, simply packed her things and left her two children to live with a beast without even an explanation. A beast that loved torturing those who are smaller than him. This story will talk about how a teenager escaped the beast and took full responsibility of her 4 year old brother and how she found love in the middle of darkness.
-comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
-comments?
@Chanceinloveq8
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